


The Moments in Between

by Joshanddonna



Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-03-20 15:06:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18995059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joshanddonna/pseuds/Joshanddonna
Summary: The moments between Josh and Donna that we didn’t see after Leo’s death.





	The Moments in Between

The Moments in Between 

Donna and Josh sat silently in the car on the way back to the hotel from the hospital. They had just received the worst news they could have possibly received. Leo was gone. He was Josh’s mentor, a father figure, and a friend. Next to Donna, he was the most important and most consistent presence in his chaotic life. Leo loved Josh as if he was his own flesh and blood. Josh returned that love in the only way he knew how, unflinching, unconditional loyalty. He had no idea how he was going to go on without his guiding light. 

Donna watched as these thoughts went through Josh’s head. She was driving, but she kept glancing over at him to gage how he was feeling. It had been a while since they communicated on a regular basis but Donna could still read Josh’s face better than anyone. She knew he was devastated, she knew he felt lost, and worst of all, she knew he felt guilty. That broke her heart. It broke her heart every time Josh thought somebody’s death was his fault. He carried the weight of the world on his shoulders and all she wanted to do was take some of it off for him. She was grieving too, but she knew that it was time for her to be strong for Josh. She knew this was different for him. Donna had always been his rock and after all, some things never change. 

Donna softly put her hand on Josh’s hand. A silent gesture to let him know that although she knew he wasn’t ready to talk, she was there. He responded by squeezing her hand tightly and clenching his jaw tightly, clearly trying not to cry. She watched as he shut his eyes and tried to stop the tears. He turned away and looked out the window to hide the fact that he was unsuccessful. He released his hand from hers to wipe the tears away. Donna could not figure out why, after 9 years, Josh did not feel comfortable crying in front of her. 

They pulled into the parking lot of the hotel and sat silently for a moment. Josh stared forward as if he was frozen. Donna broke the silence first. “Josh. Look at me.”  
He slowly turned to face her.  
“You can do this. Leo would want you to do this. This is your night. No matter what happens, you got him this far and he would want you to be proud of that.” It took everything in her not to cry every time she had to face the reality that Leo was really gone.  
Josh nodded slowly at her. She knew his head was somewhere else, but this had to be good enough for now.  
“Lets go.” 

*****  
Josh collapsed on Donna’s chest. It was only the second time he had really let himself fall apart in front of Donna. The first was when his father died. Donna sat with him, running her fingers through his curls doing the best to comfort him while she muffled her own sobs. They stayed like that until they both ran out of tears.  
Their foreheads were pressed against each other while she continued to comfort him. “I meant it Josh. I know he was proud of you. I’m proud of you too.”  
“Thanks Donna.”  
He kissed her softly. He smiled weakly at her and led her back up to the room where the campaign was celebrating.  
Donna was relieved that she was finally starting to see light in his eyes again. She knew he was not going to be okay any time soon, but she wanted so badly for him to at least try to enjoy what he had worked so hard for. 

****  
It was the day of Leo’s funeral, and Josh and Donna woke up in the same bed together, as they had for the past several days. They had yet to define their relationship, but their mutual need for comfort combined with an easy familiarity meant that this agreement was unsaid. No matter what, they were there for each other. It didn’t matter what their relationship was. Josh Lyman and Donna Moss would always need each other. 

When Donna woke up, she turned over to find Josh staring at the ceiling. She placed her hand on his chest softly. After a moment, he placed his hand on hers while they sat silently. 

Josh did not want to do this. He did not want to have to jury yet another person he loved. His sister, his father, Mrs. Landingham, now Leo. He had become all too familiar with funeral proceedings. Too familiar with sadness and pain, and with having to shove it all back down to continue on with the business of the country. This time it was different. While each loss was terrible in its own way, none of those people worked beside him from the minute he began working in presidential politics. Being Chief of Staff to the President of the United States was the culmination of Josh’s life work, and he was there because of Leo. He thought he would have him there to guide him, to show him how to live up to the Leo McGary legacy. Josh wasn’t so sure he could do it without Leo. 

“We should get ready now.” Donna said. She slowly got out of bed and made her way over to the dress she had laid out the night before. Josh sat in the same spot where she left him. Donna figured he would get up when he was ready, but was startled to find him unmoved after she was fully dressed and finished with her makeup. “Josh you really have to get ready now. The service starts in a half hour!”  
Josh was drenched in sweat, his breathing heavy and staggered. “I can’t do it, Donna.” he managed, still staring forward  
“Josh, you have to do this. I need you there, we all need you there.”  
“Not the funeral. I can’t be Chief of Staff.”  
His answer startled her, and Donna had to take a minute to find a balance between rushing him out the door and talking him off this ledge.  
“Josh, what?”  
“I can’t be me if he’s not there. The campaign was one thing, but the White House? I just can’t do it.”  
“Josh Lyman, look at me.”  
He slowly turned to look at her, and it was a look of such sadness that it physically hurt her. She felt her heart clench.  
“I know it’s going to be different without Leo. But you don’t need anyone else to make you who you are. You know you didn’t get here alone and that’s great, but now I need you to have faith that you are ready for this. Leo knew you were ready for this, I know you are ready for this, and most importantly, the President-elect knows you are ready for this.”  
He gave her a knowing look, one that expressed his appreciation without having to say it. “Let’s go say goodbye.” Josh said.


End file.
